Transparence

And it takes a whole lot of medicine
For me to pretend that I’m somebody else

Person commenting on another. How the other seemed to have no appreciation as to how his weaknesses were so transparent. His image of himself so very much at variance with how he was perceived by others, and where such collective perception was…well, perceived to have more substance.

If there is a collective sentiment as to one’s weaknesses, does this mean that one is fooling oneself if one sees things differently?

Thought of someone I knew getting fewer and fewer calls, based on his image of himself as a major business player being significantly at variance with how he is perceived by others. And how he is perceived by others is based on a lack of objective business track record. A lot of talk, a lot of posing, but very little delivery.

It ends up being collective perception with substance. Something other than the groupthink of collective gossip. Somebody sees himself or herself as an intellectual, but clearly cannot write, or write anything demonstratively innovative. Somebody sees himself or herself as a major business player, with a fractured business track record, at best.

Comes a time when some objective reality should jolt one’s self-perceptions, if inconsistent. Know I am not a barrister. Knew that from the first small claims court trial as an articling student. A couple of other trials, with similar results. More than early career experience curve. The ability to cross-examine is simply not there. So be it, and move to a different corner.

If refusing to accept the evidence that bruises, but somehow framing it as aberrant, one goes on this path of major self-delusion, year after year.

Didn’t create some barrister fantasy, contrary to the evidence.

As to other misperceptions of self…

Only to find oneself in later life being subject to some collective view: “Does this guy have no clue as to who he really is?”

Him, not me.

Of course.

Maybe float

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About brucelarochelle

Practising Lawyer and Part-Time University Instructor (Accounting, Commercial Law, Organizational Behaviour); Part-Time Federal Tribunal Member. Non-practising Chartered Professional Accountant (Chartered Accountant and Certified Management Accountant).
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